Once more, it’s been a little too long since I’ve sat down to update this blog about my life. I’ve hit sort of a slump in writing lately, but today? I’m going to try to break free.
First, Christmas. It’s come and gone, and I loved it. This year, since I actually have money, I was able to get into the “giving” part of the season, rather than the getting. As far as getting, though, my Christmas was pretty great. My dad got me Jillian Edwards’ 2014 EP, Daydream, as well as Tenth Avenue North’s Followers. They are both amazing! Also, my parents got each of the older four kids in my family a Kindle Fire. I’m using mine right now to write with a plug-in keyboard! It’s been super fun to have movies, music, and whatnot on my own device.
A song on Jillian’s EP caught my eye instantly, “Run Fast”. Of course, I, a runner, would notice that. But I’m discovering that though I run physically, my running journey needs to touch me spiritually, emotionally, and mentally. I still don’t grasp the full idea of the song, but here are a few of the lyrics:
Your heart needs a heavy dose of
Some kind of hope to hush up your fears
Some kind of sign to meet you here . . .
Run fast and wait for it
I know good will follow
Keep your head above the trouble, just
Run fast and wait for it
The message I interpreted from this was that sometimes (a lot of times) we hit the cloudy days, and can feel like sunshine ain’t coming back. The way to wait it out? “Run fast and wait for it”? What kind of answer is that?
As a runner, I see this: don’t settle for the slow jog in life just because you’re hurting. God’s got a plan for me, so I should look alive! I haven’t been created to live in tension, distrust, and sluggish depression. I’ve been put here for a purpose, so I should follow Him to live that purpose to the fullest, even when the dark days come.
If I’m going to train my body to run, really run, do I jog the 12-minute-miles all the time? No, I run fast (as fast s I can, anyway!) to see the beauty in commitment. Such is my journey with Jesus. I gotta finish out this race set before me – to the best of my ability.
“Let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart…therefore, strengthen your feeble arms and weak knees. Make level paths for your feet, so that the lame may not be disabled, but healed.” Hebrews 12:1b-3, 12-13
It’s refreshing for me to realize that the shadows don’t have to control me. I’m sure it’s annoying that I can always relate a life circumstance to running, but this kind of analogy helps me think.
In life lately, “running fast” has meant letting go. Loosening my grip on things I never had any control over in the first place. Beginning the holiday season, there was a lot of stress on my plate with relationships and such. I’m learning that the word “stress” is just another word for “I need You, Jesus”. Like a little girl in tears before her daddy’s open arms, that’s where I am when I’m stressed. Too often, though, I try to run away! As if there is any other refuge, perfect peace from the storm! Anyways, after time and some quietness, I felt a release. I was reminded in church the other day of this too: if you look around, down, or inside yourself, you will be discouraged, oppressed, and sorely disappointed. But if you look up? That is where joy and satisfaction are found 🙂